Choices
This is a continuation of sorts from my my previous post. I’ve actually thought the whole thing out before deciding to blog - i dun wana post rubbish (maybe i am, but this is the best i can do). Well…not the whole thing. Most of it, actually, over 3weeks beginning early December when Something happened.
Back to the point. In my previous blog i talked (or should it be ‘wrote’?) bout the H(h)uman M(m)ind and my inevitable inability to control it."So what if i can’t control my thoughts?" I would have liked to say that, but sorry to say the reality is thoughts never stop at just being thoughts. With one thought a new thought arises - possibilities, consequences, what-will-bes and what-could-have-beens. Sometimes i find that my final thought is about something that happens ten years after the initial thought. Stupid, and ultimately useless thoughts. But they happen. And let’s admit it, some of us do enjoy having such thoughts, don’t we? Myself included.
But when the final thought is finally laid to rest, a new, and more sinister thought arises in the form of Choices. What should we do now? What options lie ahead of us? If, and i say IF, making choices were an easy task i probably wouldnt be writing this blog today. And on a bigger scale, people would perhaps be liberated from the agony of deciding which choices they make and which they discard.
The thing is, sometimes we fret about a simple choice such as our next meal (when it shouldnt b so considering some people have no meal to look forward to). What more when the choice brings about greater consequences than whether we satisfy our taste buds? Perhaps the choice we make would hurt someone, or ourselves? Or ruin what was once a beautiful friendship? Or cause us to lose something forever?
People tell me to just let things be and decide as the choices present themselves in good time. Sound advice, i’d say, except one small problem. What if there is no time to lose? Or, in my case, i imagined that there was no time to lose? It’s when choices have to be made immediately and they all cause some serious consequence or the other that it becomes a source of agony. I know, because i’m always beset by too many choices and too little time. Do u feel that way too?
As far as my experience goes, rushing headlong into making a choice often results in Regrets(the topic of my nex post). Well, i can’t turn back time to undo or unsay certain things. A burst balloon can never be patched up and inflated again no matter how hard you try. Sometimes choices often come with a rosy promise of better things, urging us to act quickly. And in pursuit of the flower i forgot the thorns. All i got were withered petals and a bleeding hand.
Knowing that rushing to make a choice is stupid, why do i do it again and again then? Simply because deep inside every human being(i hope i can be considered as one) there is a fear of the future, of the unknown, of irreversible loss, and of death. Sometime even when i try to withdraw from choosing, a fear sets in- what if i don’t have another opportunity to act on the choice? will being passive now cause me regret in the future?
All in all, even deciding whether to act on a choice or not, and deciding between choices are choices in itself. In most of the cases, they lead to Regrets. Some don’t. But most do.
